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Wednesday 15 June 2011

a polish poke

jesus mac criste. were the frig am i. iv ad a terrifyin expereence. i woke up in the back of an aldi lorry on monday mornin. i could feel we were movin an no one cud hear me scream. then two little faces popped up out of the brokoli box. i shit. i saw me life flash before me. then i saw somethin else flash before me. im goran heez ivan he said. next i now ive got one in the pink n one in the stink. i didnt say owt incase they hurt me. bowt an hour later back of the lorry opens an im in friggin dover. some blokes in uniform dragged me owt by me roll on. i managed to make up some story about bein kidnapped by this bloke coz i saw him takin blokes in his van. turns owt duckers was on a robbin job from the aldi lorry. i waz twatted an went to help him. but wen he got into the lorry i crashed owt an he forgot abowt me. how do i get into these situwashons. ad to chuck a sicky. managed to get a lift back wiv one of me Stowbie mates. i was shagged when i got home.

did me four hours yesterday at me shop, lyn wiv the limp said shes watchin me closely. i bet she is the ald lezzer. fat frank cudnt give a shiny shit. got off early with me usual little treet for him. went up to that posh garden senter to get some new plants for me window box. some rite stuck up gets in there. i still ad me overall on so everyone thort i werked there. then some posh cow showts over to me... av you got trailin labelia.... i said fuck off no i aint thats me flip flop. cheeky cow im a bit loose rite enuff but i aint snail trails yet. rite im off need to do a shop. laterz.

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