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Saturday, 18 August 2012

Orgazms n Busses...

Iya...how yer doin...hope yer all enjoyin me 50 shades of Paradise...Pound Parasdise...it's goin menkal on the hits wen i post it...well talkin of Paradise...Pound Paradise its bin go go go...I was sat there the other day rushed off me cankles on me till...'1 Item Or Else' lane an me fone goes...it's a lovelee laydee askin me if i'd like to do an interview for her magazeen...well the first thing i thort was she'll want me breasticles out at least...no...sheez ded nice an says sheez a fan an loves wat i do...FFS I serve on a till an let blokes sniff me Far La...wats interestin abowt that...anywayz i says yes an that were that....well low n behowld just like that sayin goes....Yer wait ages for an Orgazm then 3 come at once...she only goes n offers me me own column in Lifestyle Monthly Magazine...I nearly shat a love egg...me the pound shop shelf stacker Beverly Macca wiv me own Column...I felt like Marjeree Proops crossed wiv Ester Rantzen...we ad a meetin an i said yes I'll do it....so if yer out n about an see the Magazine Lifestyle Monthly or go to www.lifestylemonthly.co.uk you can read me bits n bobs...here's Mander Moss who owns an runs it...sheez ded posh...i ad to take a fraze book to now wat she woz sayin...
Anyway...I agress as the posh say...that was that or so I thort...then she menshons me helpin out in the background at Liverpool Fashon Week...showin the gerls how do flornt it n all that...plus me garjus Mark Heyes mite be comin if I can sweet talk him....but to top it all too me garjus Nick Ede mite come too wiv Lizzie Cundy...I'm so ecksited...here's me in me Liverpool Fashon Week tee shirt kurtesee of Mander Moss...
Work hasnt bin grate...i'm gettin loadsa greef abowt bein on me till...i'm not bein funny but duz it say anywere in me kontract that i hav to talk to anyone?...duz it say thow shallt not use yer mobile or read Bella or Real People?...no....but i'm sick of skanky customers moanin...I need to get outta here...wonder if Simone Cowell will av me...at least Mander is helpin take me away from it all...look at the gob on this one...I'd just got to me favorit artickle in me mags the 62 year old woman who had gone to Marmaris in Turkey n Samir the waiter said 'I am lovin you Doreen from Cleethorps an I want to marry you...it is nuthin to do wid yo money'.....the endin is always the same mind...so I new wat was comin....
but thats not the point...she tried to take me magazine off me...how rude...well movin on...Celebrity Big Brother...OMG...the loveliest laydee off the telly is on it...Dame Coleen of the Nolan...me an Col hav a bit of histree from her time at This Morning in the hub...we had great banter an many Tweeters loved it...miss her there...but she is sooooo goin to win this...here we go agen...I'm mindin me own bizness on Friday mornin an Adam from 7waves radio rings me an sayz can you be our Celeb Big Brother voice on me show...another bus another orgazm...so off I goes to the stewdio...i'm not in there 5 minits an i think Adam puts the heat up on the stewdio thermostat just so I take me bra off...an off it came...
we had a good chat live on air an I didnt let a Twunt or a Cunto out...i woz ded prowd of meself...again after that I've bin aksed to do a regular peece wile CBB is on...so if you are near yer wireless choon it into 92.1FM or you can go to www.7waves.co.uk and listen live...it's gonna be called Big Sid's bit on the side...an here's our logo...come an join us an join Adam weekdays between 10 and 2...I'll be there Monday Weds and Friday...
Oh well...I've bin a bad gerl this week an bin out on a skool nite mostly selebraytin me extra bits n bobs...me cankles are up like baloons an i've not had time to fart...but d'ya know I'm lovin it...an i wanna say a big thank you to all of yerz for supportin me...i'm always here for yerz to make yer smile or let yer offload...love yerz all lots........here's the view at Casa Macca most nites this week...laterz...xxxx
 


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