I'm new to all this tekno stuff. but sum peeple av asked to read me diary so here it is...I'm an eezy goin gerl...simple tastes...like nites in with Lambrini...nites out with Lambrini...work at Pound Paradise...drive me Cunto (Corsa/Punto cut n shut)...love me gays..
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Thursday, 3 November 2011
Smear to eternity...
in the words of frankie n his four seasons 'oh wat a night...day aktually'... i was up at the crack n up me crack at 6am... i waz determined to av me nancy smellin fresh for Dr Parfinder eez quite fit an new... i dooshed up there the lot... finished off me crem fresh too... i mean fem fresh... gets to the surgery at 8.30 sharp... then I get called in... it waz like Si eed from Eastenders lookin back at me... said i looked very well and as well as me smeer waz due an internal inspekshon...I cud feel me fanny clamp shut... just kept sayin i carnt beleeve how well you look... so off i go to drop me leggins wile he warms his hands on the hand dryer... over he comes... he waz very gentle as he did a Cilla and stepped inside love... then he stops an aks if i waz aware there waz an IUD still inserted an did i now it cudve bin removed after me men o porze... i said shit off i'm still blobbin if yer dont mind... pulled up me tites n me leggins an went to leave.... then he says Mrs Hacker I need to talk to you... I said me names Macca - turns out old iron lung lill next door Mrs Emily Hacker was due for it... i had opened her letter by mistake an wiv me glue ear hadn't heard them shoutin for Emily Hacker... she's fuckin 80 odd... no wonder he thort i looked well an shocked to find me coil..... I've just opened a 5 liter box to get over the shock...laterz...